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Absence

Since I have been doing childcare at home full time, I have really had to be so absent in many other ways. I never accounted for how difficult it would be, but it is so much like working outside of the home-except I can see so clearly what I am not able to do while I am here. What motivated the change was of course Madison and Drew. They are at these amazing little stages and I felt like I was missing it all! They are so much fun to be with and so much fun to observe. I am so blessed, I need to cling to that blessing before they slip away.

I want to try to be more dilligent to record these moments, I haven't taken pictures in a while..I can't wait to do it again. Some of the things the kids have been doing that I want to record and remember:

Madison is becoming so independant and transforming from a baby into a little lady. She tries to serve herself so much more and I need to remember to let go and let her do these things..she is so capable.

She is so kind to ber brother, when he is hurt or upset, she is always near to comfort him and encourage him.

The kids have figured out how to turn on their own dvds! This is awesome for me, but I worry they will break the paystation.

Madison spends most of her time lately coloring. I try to provide a constant supply of crayons and markers. She loves art and creating right now. Sunday, during the family's nap time she colored for hours!

Drew has gotten really into the cars movie. He has the lightning and chick cars with the transport truck and he sleeps with them every night. He knows all the words to the movies and often says the lines, "Me, You, DINNER! K-Chow!" Just like in the movie. It is so adorable! He loves to line up all his cars and pretend to race them. He revs his engine and is in his own little car world..I love it. I just think it is so amazing how specific a boy's interests are and different from a girl! With the movie, he makes all the sound effects along with the movie while it plays.

I hope to have time soon to post pictures. We are going to the beach soon, I will try to take zillions. I think Moriah is going to go too, I am excited to spend that time with her too. Matt hasn't been able to see the kids at the beach yet, watching them will be so much fun!

We are preparing for our first camping trip, so that will be interesting!

Madison starts ballet this Friday! Can't wait for that either.

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Let Him dwell within me, ALL of my days. He is my and the only source of real JOY! The world is a liar. Only YOU can decide who you want to be, your identity is either in the world or in Jesus. If it's in Jesus then you are perfect because He is perfect. He atoned for all of our real imperfections. If sin leads to death, why do we chase it? Why do we chase the grave instead of His grace? Me too, it's a daily surrender of my desire for the world. Daily, hourly, minutely. The pull is intense and the struggle is real. Literally. No matter what happens to me, you know your mother's heart chases after Jesus Christ Himself. It is not the path of least resistance. On the contrary. I live my life for Him and through Him because I have already experienced the contrary. It was a state of darkness and death. Absence of light and of love. Of course I want to spare you the suffering of that course but sometimes we must walk through that mire to appreciate Him as he washes it off of us s...