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Family...

I have a peculiar family situation...All of my dad's side live far, far away and I rarely see them. It's weird, I have only seen each cousin on that side like, 2 or 3 times in my whole life. I have to admit, I feel cheated...not that anyone in particular is responsible. I say that because living where I do, I see what it is like to be surrounded by Matt's family and I see first hand the benefits to all of our children. I wish so much that I had had that same opportunity to develop relationships with my cousins and other family.

I had the unique opportunity to visit with one of my cousins today. I can't tell you how wonderful a feeling it is to know she is out there. The last time I saw her she was just a little kid, like 9 years ago or so. I can't believe how much she has changed, and too how much the same she is. But, to feel connected to someone far away...cause I really relate to her personality and interests..it's kinda neat. I only got to see her for breakfast, not much time at all. I am however, thankful for those two hours I got to spend getting to know her a little bit. It makes me think about my other cousins and how much I wish I could spend more time with each of them.

My grandparents on my dad's side are awesome. Although I did not know them as well as my cousin, we shared the opinion that they are wonderful people. My grandmother, she is the most distinguished and elegant woman I have ever seen. She is perfectly beautiful and certainly does not look her age. My grandpa is approaching 80 and still working all the time. (I think they are still in their 70's) He is so wonderful, kind and sweet. I have never sent an e-mail to him that was not returned with love. I am lucky to have them, but oh how I wish we could have grown up closer to them all.

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Let Him dwell within me, ALL of my days. He is my and the only source of real JOY! The world is a liar. Only YOU can decide who you want to be, your identity is either in the world or in Jesus. If it's in Jesus then you are perfect because He is perfect. He atoned for all of our real imperfections. If sin leads to death, why do we chase it? Why do we chase the grave instead of His grace? Me too, it's a daily surrender of my desire for the world. Daily, hourly, minutely. The pull is intense and the struggle is real. Literally. No matter what happens to me, you know your mother's heart chases after Jesus Christ Himself. It is not the path of least resistance. On the contrary. I live my life for Him and through Him because I have already experienced the contrary. It was a state of darkness and death. Absence of light and of love. Of course I want to spare you the suffering of that course but sometimes we must walk through that mire to appreciate Him as he washes it off of us s...